Ever go a day without complaining, and see how good you feel when the sun goes down?
Before I begin, I’m sure you’ve realized that, yes, this article is late…
Did you complain? If you’re an avid reader of my blog, I’m sure you did. Just last night, I announced that post dates and times were set, and this Monday, an article was to be expected. It’s Tuesday, you say? Oops. 😏
If you complained about the late arrival of my post, which was done absolutely purposely, (but I’m still sorry about), then you wasted a few minutes of your life there. Did your complaining make this post come any sooner? Were the complaints directly sent to me? Did you internalize the complaints? If the answers are “no, no, and yes”, then you’ve likely wasted your time and breath on a complaint that changed nothing.
We all do it; it’s undeniable. In traffic when we’re late to work, when our favorite show is on hiatus, when our favorite sports team loses… even in school, when the bell takes foreverrrr to ring. I’m sure, deep down, we all realize that we can’t control these things. So why do we complain about them? Who knows; human nature?
Through complaining, essentially all we do is dampen our moods, while radiating pessimism, and who wants that? No one, of course. But complaining is done everyday, by everyone anyway. You simply cannot control your outer environment; the things you complain about daily can’t be controlled. Unless the problems are things you’ve brought upon yourself and CAN change but DON’T… but that’s a conversation for another day. Today is all about internalization, how to stop, and how to find peace with the things that you can’t change.
Internalization vs. Externalization
We all internalize. It’s natural; when we’re uncomfortable, naturally the first instinct is to keep your discomfort internalized- it’ll pass soon enough. But internalizing is never a good thing, especially when one has temporamental qualities about them. Now this has nothing to do with needing therapy sessions to “get your feelings out”. But internalization is the stem to complaining.
Humans are naturally inclined to gossip, no matter what the gossip may be. When there is something to complain about, we turn to the first person we see and go at it. Most are naturally inclined to listen, agree, and complain as well. This is where externalization comes into play. It is a never endng cycle of complaints, and only a select few are immune to the cycle.
So… How Do I Stop?
Relax…take a deep breath and realize that complaining does not change a thing when it comes to environmental factors. You and only you can really decide which way your emotions turn. Next time you are stuck in traffic, surrounded by horn honks and pissed drivers on the Eisenhower, turn on your favorite radio station or grab that aux! Make your ride to work a little more interesting and a lot faster with the distraction. Next time your favorite team loses, arrange for a little get together for the next game; surely the surrounding friends and/or family will take the majority of the sting out of the loss. And if your show is on hiatus… find another show! Fill your time with something productive, go outside!
And, my goodness, y’all… everybody goes through school. It’s normal, it’s natural, it’s required. Everybody else goes through it just like you and I’m sure they’re thinking the exact same things. Get over it, pay attention, take your notes, and you may just learn an interesting thing or two that you didn’t know before. Make the most of your time at school, seeing as, you have to be there.
There are so many things that we waste our breath on daily, things that we can’t change, and things that we certainly should not let ruin our days. Try turning that negativity into positivity. I gave a few examples above, but there are so many other ways to turn your sour mood around when it comes down to complaining about things that can’t be changed. And so, I have a challenge for you…
As of right now, I challenge every single one of you that reads this post to sit down, think about what you complain about daily, (the things that CAN’T be changed), and starting tomorrow morning when you wake up… wait for it… don’t complain! It’s so much easier said than done, but it can be done and that’s the point. At the end of the day, right as you lay in bed, reflect. Notice how much better you feel when you realize that the things you complained about just the day before don’t even matter.
Feel free to let me know the results!